Images & Emotions Can Be Deceiving

I've been pondering on the concept of emotion via imagery, or vice-versa, as spoken of in the post previous to this one, The Images In My Head. I believe it was the emotion that gushed forth, first... the imagery was secondary to the emotion. Perhaps this analysis of the two, in conjunction with one another, can help me come to terms with false emotion. From there, perhaps I can learn to make wiser decisions, based on reality, rather than one fleeting moment in time. I feel a bit like Pavlov's rats, at the moment. I'm not sure I can determine what is really real, what is imagined, what is conditioned, or what is hoped for, one from the other.

The emotions which I felt with the soul connect, was something which I had no control over. It was my learned history which issued the emotion forth. Warm embrace means Love. Warm embrace means safety. Warm embrace means connection. Warm embrace means lightness. Warm embrace means innocence. Warm embrace means deep love. I felt all those things, it is true... and, the images which entered my brain, from having felt those emotions, were images which reflected the conditions of the days of my youth... when all those things existed and prevailed in my life, all in conjunction with one another. They were all connected, none was separate from the other. To see green grass, to experience a warm sun, to feel the wind, or hear tinkling water... and witness yellow butterflies... all these things were connected with the emotions of my youth... when there was narry a care in the world, an unlimited future was before me. There was true innocence, and there was a snuggly feeling of knowing that I was not all alone in the world.

To have rec'd a warm embrace... and to have experienced an emotion, which was relived from my past... and to have rec'd the images that marked those emotions, did not mean that any of those things was true. Unless it could be said that those things were true for that one single moment, in time... with no room for expectation, of the same, in the immediate future. I think this is where I get confused, often, and travel down roads I might not have traveled, otherwise... searching for the safety, security, and warmth of emotion, that a warm embrace had given me as a child. Mistaking one kind moment as something to base a future on. What I have learned today is that one kind moment is just that... one kind moment. And means nothing more. It most definitely does not mean security... and the connectedness is only for the moment being experienced... there is not an automatic carry-over.

The images were real... just as the emotions were... but present emotion, based on past learned emotion, is mostly temporal, I believe. Maybe some things can never be repeated. Maybe we are always reaching for a reality that is just not possible... for we can never truly go backward in time... and often we suffer with the memory of what has been lost, and in trying to repeat it over and over again, much to our chagrined soul.