I couldn't help but take note: I have been practicing "docking" with the big boats that I will soon be driving for tours. What is docking? Ease of approach? Safe landing? The ability to maneuver into a stable position? Finding solid ground? Finding safe ground? Safe harbor?
Ok, so I could understand learning to dock the big old 65 foot boat. Ok? finesse has not been my middle name in the docking arena. But here's the surprise.
I was totally shocked to find that I had difficulty docking the canoe??? Of course I had expected the "take out" spot to be on solid ground... not moving water? I had no idea I would be expected to paddle up to a mooring... or should I say dock, since there were not ropes or lines? Nor any way to anchor oneself, at all. What I hadn't expected was to keep on moving, when I approached my dock. Then? I paddled in circles, trying to get back at it again. More than once?
It didn't take but a small flash of insight for the bigger picture to engulf me. I was still having trouble finding a place to take root. Still having trouble staying put. Still having trouble finding solid ground. Still having trouble with feeling safe and secure.
Crap! Gimme a break, already. Why do there always have to be these silly messages shouting out at me.
It is true, I recently left a 3 year relationship. It seems I am always "moving on"... never finding that "place called home"...
... Captain says, "practice, practice, practice"...
...at least I know when to move on...
Love the world into change
-
Dear Friends,
I am blogging again, but in a different place...
I invite you to join me here....
http://lovetheworldintochange.com
With love,
Maithri
14 years ago
2 comments:
Another good one. I dunno..., I just like this creative and analytical direction in your writing. Your solo canoeing experience was so brave and sorta "out-there". I wish I was more like that. And when you write like this, I feel like I am right there with ya. It's fun. And funny.
:D
Maybe, to twist an old cliche, "The river is what happens to us while we're busy looking for a safe docking harbor" (or something like that...).
Thanks for sharing your life.
Bill, so glad you feel as though you are there, experiencing it too... that's kinda what writing should do, I think. Brave might be the word for my canoe trip... others may see it as foolish... either way, it's just part of who I am. I got tired of missing out on things that I long to do... if there is no one to do them with you? ... why, then do them alone, or never do them, at all. Kinda got tired of forming my life around other's lives (especially when it was all one way, never the other way, or even meeting in the middle)... decided to get a life of my own... and solo seems to be the direction my life is taking. The River... that Mighty River... forever Flowing... and now I'm Flowing, again, too... thanks for dropping by :D
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